Return-Path: X-Original-To: info@ausheart.com.au Delivered-To: info@ausheart.com.au Received: from localhost (marlin.fishinternet.com.au [127.0.0.1]) by marlin.fishinternet.com.au (Postfix) with ESMTP id E207B3FA02 for ; Mon, 13 Mar 2006 15:43:30 +1100 (EST) Received: from marlin.fishinternet.com.au ([127.0.0.1]) by localhost (marlin.fishinternet.com.au [127.0.0.1]) (amavisd-new, port 10024) with ESMTP id 07825-07 for ; Mon, 13 Mar 2006 15:43:17 +1100 (EST) Received-SPF: none (marlin.fishinternet.com.au: 150.101.193.82 is neither permitted nor denied by domain of fathersonline.org) client-ip=150.101.193.82; envelope-from=info@fathersonline.org; helo=polyglot.com.au; Received: from polyglot.com.au (eth2643.nsw.adsl.internode.on.net [150.101.193.82]) by marlin.fishinternet.com.au (Postfix) with ESMTP id AF42ADEB0A for ; Mon, 13 Mar 2006 15:43:15 +1100 (EST) Received: from server ([192.168.100.14]) by polyglot.com.au with Microsoft SMTPSVC(6.0.3790.211); Mon, 13 Mar 2006 15:44:32 +1100 Thread-Topic: Fathers Singing Crazy Songs Reply-To: Message-ID: <3e1c01c64658$d25b6830$0101a8c0@polyglot.local> thread-index: AcZGWNJZi5w+HT2SRDq3xEsZ7iPnng== From: To: Subject: Spam Alert: Fathers Singing Crazy Songs Date: Mon, 13 Mar 2006 15:44:32 +1100 MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="----=_NextPart_000_3E1D_01C646B5.05CBE030" X-Mailer: Microsoft CDO for Exchange 2000 Content-Class: urn:content-classes:message Importance: normal Priority: normal X-MimeOLE: Produced By Microsoft MimeOLE V6.00.3790.326 X-OriginalArrivalTime: 13 Mar 2006 04:44:32.0691 (UTC) FILETIME=[D25B6830:01C64658] X-Virus-Scanned: amavisd-new at fishinternet.com.au This is a multi-part message in MIME format. ------=_NextPart_000_3E1D_01C646B5.05CBE030 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Unable to read this email? Please click here Issue 182 - 20th February,2006 Go to our website Here * Welcome Warwick * Grandads * Laughter * Single Dads * All you need is Love * Thought of the Week * Putting Our Children First * News & Info * Dad's Prayer * About Us Welcome Warwick When you Google 'Can't Buy Me Love', the famous song by Paul McCartney, first performed by the Beatles, way back in the sixties, 5 million references come up. That just shows how influential the Beatles still are today, some 45 years down the track. I'll buy you a diamond ring my friend, If it makes you feel alright. I'll get you anything my friend, If it makes you feel alright, For I don't care too much for money For money can't buy me love. It would seem that the message is still relevant today, here in Australia, as happiness and love go together. According to a recent survey of Federal Electorates, Australia's saddest electorate is in the heart of Sydney, the richest and most expensive city in the country while the happiest voters live in one of the nation's poorest rural electorates. In a survey that turns the accepted political wisdom on its head, one of the most disadvantaged electorates in Australia, the Queensland seat of Wide Bay, has emerged as the one where people are at their most content. Wide Bay, which takes in the coast of Hervey Bay and the World Heritage-listed Fraser Island, has topped Australia's 150 electorates on the basis of wellbeing and sense of community, according to the first electorate-based national index of wellbeing compiled by Deakin University. In standard of living, health, achievement in life, personal relationships, sense of safety, connection to the community and future security, the index found Wide Bay came out on top - despite limping along at the bottom of other surveys that measure employment, income, education and economic strength. Eight of the top nine happiest electorates are poor and isolated rural communities, while all of the saddest seats are metropolitan or outer metropolitan seats. What does this tell us? That Paul McCartney got it right!! Money can't buy love or happiness. In my career as a touring musician with a musical family, The Marshes, we have performed in some of the poorest and richest areas of the world, sometimes sleeping in African Villages on mud floors and other times in five star hotels - always connecting with the people. Consistently we have found that the poorest of the poor are much happier than the richest of the rich. Mother Teresa said it this way, "The curse of the third world is poverty, but the curse of the western world is loneliness and sadness." Jesus sums it all up, "a man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions." The joy in our life comes from the quality of our relationships, not our money in the bank. Over the last few years there has been much talk about the work family balance, and the need to get it right. In many ways the tension in the work family balance has got more to do with the tension about what should take priority in our lives. Is it the 'things' that our work gives us the opportunity to acquire that are most important, or is it the love we give and receive and the quality of our relationships within our friends and family. If you tell too many people that money can't buy love you might find yourself singing along with Billy Thorpe, 'Some people I know think that I am crazy'. Still I think that if I was a betting man I would be putting my money on Paul McCartney's 'Can't Buy Me Love'. Lovework Have some fun around the dinner table with your family as you sing along with the Beatles: Say you don't want no diamond ring and I'll be satisfied. Tell me that you want those kind of things That money just can't buy. For I don't care too much for money, For money can't buy me love. Can't buy me love, everybody tells me so, Can't buy me love, no, no, no, no. You never know, if you sing it enough you just might start to believe it! Yours for singing crazy songs Warwick Marsh PS We have launched 'Operation Children First' to help the Federal Government put a priority on our children (The current Family Law Reform Amendment Proposal is fatally flawed). Children need justice and mothers and fathers need equality in Family Law. Shared parenting will help reduce the divorce rate and help stem the tide of fatherlessness in our nation. Will you help us advocate for Australian children? Check out the 'Operation Children First' section of the newsletter for further information. We only have two weeks before the final vote is taken. Help us help the children. ________________________________________ Warwick Marsh has been married to Alison for 30 years. He is the father of five children, four boys and one girl, ranging in age from 25 years to 13 years. Warwick is a musician, songwriter, producer and public speaker who likes to think he can still laugh at himself. back to top Grandads Measure wealth not by the things you have, but by the things you have for which you would not take money. anon back to top Laughter One afternoon a wealthy lawyer was riding in his shiny limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate the situation. He asked one man, "Why are you eating grass?" "We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "We HAVE TO eat grass." Shocked, the lawyer said, "Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you!" "But sir. I have a wife and two children with me. They are over there, under that tree." "Bring them along," the lawyer replied. Turning to the other poor man he said, "You come with us, too." The second man said, "But sir, I also have a wife and SIX children with me!" "Bring them all!" the lawyer answered. They all jammed into the huge limo. Once underway, one of the poor fellows turned to the lawyer and said, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you." Genuinely touched, the lawyer replied, "Glad to do it. You'll really love my place; the grass is almost a foot high!" back to top Single Dads Press Release: March 8th, 2006 Equal Parenting laws AN INEVITABILITY, says Australian Parenting group Australian equal parenting group, Fathers4Equality, has stated that equal parenting time after separation is an inevitable development, simply awaiting a government with enough resolve to put the rights of children ahead of the vested interests of single mother's groups. Currently, the government is in the process of debating the recently introduced Family Law Amendment Bill, a commendable bill that is intended to usher in a new era of equal parenting arrangements. As part of this process, Fathers4Equality has recently presented its well researched submission on the benefits of equal parenting to children of separated families, entitled "Parents are Forever...even if marriages are not" to the Senate Hearing on the provisions of the Family Law Amendment. "The benefits of equal parenting are well accepted and have been repeatedly demonstrated in very credible research" says Ash Patil, President of Fathers4Equality. "These benefits are accepted by the majority in Parliament, however the only significant obstacles right now to a presumption of equal parenting time are the self-serving interests of single mother's groups, who tend to have a disproportional influence on the government." Despite the overwhelming benefits of equal parenting time, and the well documented child abuse risks associated with single-mother households, the government has unfortunately baulked at recommending a rebuttable presumption of equal parenting time in its Family Law Amendment Bill, and has instead opted for asking the Family Court to "consider" equal parenting time only. Without a rebuttable presumption of equal parenting time, many fathers are concerned that the Howard government is making the same mistake as the Keating government in 1995, with its own family law amendments that were also intended to create equal parenting as a norm. Not only did the 1995 amendments fail absolutely, but equal parenting orders as a result fell by more than half. For the current Family Law Amendment Bill to achieve the full benefits of equal parenting for as many Australian children of separated families as possible, a legal presumption of equal parenting time is required, as a starting point in child custody considerations. This presumption should be rebuttable, meaning that it will not apply where there is convincing evidence that it is harmful to the child, or where the parents mutually decide on different arrangements. [Distribute freely] Direct link: http://www.fathers4equality-australia.org/equalparenting/fathers4equalit y.nsf/pages/EqualParentingInevitability Ash Patil president@fathers4equality-australia.org PO Box 57, THIRROUL, NSW, 2515 0437-967-955 back to top All you need is Love Only a wife would say that! by Michael Kiely The words popped out of my mouth before I could stop them: "Only a wife would say that!" They came so naturally and yet their effect was explosive. Let me explain: Occasionally, in the heat of conversation, you'll be explaining something and you'll quote a figure or state a fact that is not in itself important, but you miss the mark recollecting the exact figure or fact and you blurt out something to support your point, then move on. No one but a pedant would stop your flow and humiliate you in front of a group of people, but this voice pipes up: "No, that's not right. it's nearer to (whatever)..." And it is th melifluous tones of your beloved's voice. A sane man simply looks at his watch, shouts "IS that the time?" and rushes out of the room. An insane man says: "Only a wife would say that!" I am insane. I had to apologise like a b*st**d, thinking all the time "It's you who should be apologising." She was deeply hurt by the remark, perhaps because it hit home. Your best friend wouldn't do it, so why will a wife do it? Exercise compassion, Michael. Likely explanation: she realised what she had done and attacked me for saying something that humiliated her in public (the mirror image of what she had done to me). Often when we have a go at someone for doing something, if we look back at ourselves we find that we have done the same thing and we're covering for ourselves. (The Bible says don't worry about the speck in your brother's eye, worry about the log in you own eye.) The fact is I humilated her in retaliation, without meaning to. It comes so easily to me to hurt her feelings, as it does to all of us. ("You always hurt the one you love..." goes the old song.) Why are we so cavalier with the feelings of those closest to us? Why can't we say all the praiseworthy things they do all the time? Anyway, as luck would have it, a couple of days later she was in a position to say, "Only a husband would say that..." and we had a laugh. She's a wonderful woman because she's human and subject to human frailty. By sheer luck, so am I! We will stagger on together, wearing off the rough edges of each other to make the perfect partner, like it says in the book. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Free Offer of E-Book for Fathersonline Subscribers 'Man Overboard' by Michael Kiely is a breakthrough book, designed to help men rescue and renew their marriage relationships. Michael has been married for over 30 years, has three children and a background in business and marketing. He shares with his readers how he rescued his own marriage when it went into crisis mode. 'Man Overboard' is short (100 pages), filled with headlines, valuable insights and quotations and doesn't beat around the bush. Warwick Marsh, founder of the 'Fatherhood Foundation' says, 'Every man should read this book if he is serious about staying married. It is easy to fall in love, but you have to fight to stay in love. Michael Kiely's book will give you keys to win the battle of love and save your marriage from destruction. 'Man Overboard' will help to keep the 'love fires' burning, but beware, this book is only for the brave. The fainthearted should not read this book.! Michael is insistent that we continue to make his book available to our readers. To get your free copy of 'Man Overboard' (normally over $20), simply send your request with a copy of the first page of your fathersonline (which contains your first name and email address), to Michael Kiely: michael@newhorizon.au.com with 'Free copy of Man Overboard' written in the subject line. Make sure you give Michael some feedback on his kindness in giving you a copy, free of charge. back to top Thought of the Week I'll give you all I've got to give, If you'll say you love me too. I may not have a lot to give, But what I've got I'll give to you. For I don't care too much for money, For money can't buy me love. Paul McCartney back to top Putting Our Children First Putting Our Children First 'Operation Children First' is the name given to our call for action from the fatherhood and men's groups of Australia. We must put our children first and unite with one voice and demand justice for our children and equality for mothers and fathers in the proposed family law reform. We agree with Barry Williams, President of Lone Fathers Association Australia (LFAA), who gave testimony before the Senate enquiry on Friday 3rd March 2006 in Parliament House, Canberra, when he said that the "Family Law Amendment (Shared Parenting Responsibility) Bill 2005 should be renamed the Equal Parenting Time Bill 2006. It is of the utmost importance that in this bill the words must be entrenched that the children in separated and divorced families have a natural and paramount right to have equal parenting time with their children. For too long now, we have witnessed children not being allowed these natural rights which is an infringement on their rights as referred to by the Charter of the Rights of the Child (United Nations). The family relationship centres, when set up, must be told they have to start at an equal parenting time where one parent requests it." We, as representatives of the fatherhood and men's movement of Australia, believe that the only way to entrench in law the above statement is through a rebuttable presumption of equal parenting time that guarantees the children this fundamental human right. Adults divorce each other, but children do not divorce their mother and father. Children need a mother and a father, but the current family law reform bill as now presented to the Senate, while well intentioned is fatally flawed as an instrument of reform that can guarantee our children justice, and mother and fathers equality before a court of law. Unless such amendments, as suggested above, among others, are included in the new bill then the new family law reform bill will be ignored by the Family Law Court just as the well intentioned family law reforms suggested by the Keating Government were ignored in 1995. As Bob Dylan sings, 'When will we ever learn?' The fatherhood and men's movement of Australia calls upon men as fathers to make a stand for Australia's children by doing the following. 1. Contacting the Senators in your state of residence by email, letter, phone and fax. The very best way is to go and visit them personally. Ask them to amend the bill and put our children first. For Senate contact details go to: www.aph.gov.au 2. Contacting all 72 Senators by email, letter, phone, fax and appointment and ask them to put our children first and grant equality to mothers and fathers in a court of law. 3. Contact all the media outlets you know, local papers, national papers, TV and radio, including talkback radio, and ask them to publicise the fact that the current family law reform is fatally flawed as it stands and the Family Relationship Centres will not work unless the Family Law Court is directed to give equality and justice to both parents and children. 4. Contact all your friends, neighbours and those within your respective networks to also help you do all of the above to put our children first, above the interests of the corrupted family law system. Our children need justice and mothers and fathers need equality. How much longer must our children wait? For comment on the above please contact: Warwick Marsh Fatherhood Foundation 02 4272 6677 041 822 5212 Barry Williams Lone Fathers Association 02 6258 4216 0417 668 802 Ash Patil Fathers for Equality 0437 967 955 Mark Bourne Richard Hillman Foundation 08 8391 1755 0408 917 125 back to top News & Info Nappy times ahead as baby boom hits Parramatta Date: March 5 2006 By Amy Lawson The Parramatta Eels have embarked on a secret off-season recruiting mission, but salary cap auditor Ian Schubert can rest easy - these recruits won't be ripe until at least 2023. Six Eels players become fathers in the off-season - four for the first time. Veteran prop Paul Stringer was the first to welcome an off-season arrival with the birth of his daughter Lucy on October 27. It's the second child for Stringer and his wife Mel, who have a four-year-old son Jack. Captain Nathan Cayless and fiancee Erin Pope were close behind with daughter Mia born on October 31 and Adam and Donna Peek had their first daughter Chali on November 18. Nathan Hindmarsh's partner Bonnie Scott gave birth to their first son Archie on January 11, Glenn and Robyn Morrison had their second child, Beau Shae, on January 24, and Henry Perenara and partner Karinda Leary's son Tremayne was born on January 29. Morrison said talk at training these days was more likely to centre on nappy-changing techniques and bottle feeding than set plays and team tactics. "You'd never think it but the boys are sitting around at training talking about babies," he said. "You wouldn't do that in the past. "The young blokes hear us talking about babies and they just shake their heads and walk the other way." Despite the cringe factor for some of his younger teammates, Morrison believes the family atmosphere has been a good influence on the rookies. "I've been in teams before where they're more party-oriented off the field," he said. "It's a pretty mature team. Blokes will have a drink and a dance but they don't go silly. "The young guys are keen to go out and have a good time when they can but they don't go overboard because they see how the senior players behave." Learn the Skills to Parenting God's Way The phenomenal success of the Super Nanny TV show has highlighted the great need for parents to understand how to raise children. Some of Australia's key parenting speakers will be doing just that at the 2006 Practical Parenting Seminar. Produced by Media Inc, publishers of Alive and Christian Woman magazines, the Practical Parenting Seminar will show you God's way to parenting. Baby Love author Robin Barker, parenting speaker and author Terri Hardwick and Focus on the Family Chairman Neville Cox will be the key speakers at this seminar, to be held at the Marriott International, North Ryde, on Saturday April 29. The Practical Parenting Seminar is specifically for parents of children of all ages and teaches the art of parenting. With programs that range from taming toddlers, right through to parents learning to work together, the Practical Parenting Seminar is a must for all parents. Online registration, speaker bios and a full program for the day is available at www.christianwoman.com.au Registration is available on the morning from 8.30am, with the seminar commencing at 9.00am and finishing at 3.00pm. The Practical Parenting Seminar is just $55 or $99 per couple. As a special offer, register before March 31, 2006 and you can bring along a friend for only $29.95. For more information on this media release, please phone: Glenn Wysman Event Manager, Media Inc Telephone: 02 8437 3541 Email: gwysman@mediaincorporated.org Website: www.christianwoman.com.au ________________________________________________________ Fresh Start Monthly Meeting Fresh Start is a support group for people who are single again. 7.30pm, Saturday 25th March 2006 at St Paul's Anglican Church, 421 Old Northern Rd Castle Hill Speakers: Michael & Julie Horgan are the new leaders of Fresh Start. They have a story to tell of marriage breakdown, remarriage and the challenges of raising a blended family. Suggested donation: $5.00 Enquiries: 96296680 - Michael or Julie _____________________________________________ Letters Dear Fatherhood Foundation Thanks for the support that you are providing for fathers through your newsletter. Sometimes the simple things can be extremely helpful 'like the segment in Newsletter 182 re men hold keys to their wives' calm. There being a bit of tension in our relationship at the time, I decided to put the advice into practice immediately. I found my wife, sat next to her, and took her hand in mine. She cried. The tension was gone. Thanks for that piece of positive advice. Cheers Denis * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Dear Fatherhood Foundation Your newsletter is sensational - congratulations! I have been trying to find a telephone number for you without success. Kind regards Catherine * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Thank you Fatherhood Foundation. Hey, I loved the prayer at the end of the newsletter, what a challenge. I think how true it is that marriage can kill the selfishness out of men. In fact, I believe a good marriage will make a husband a better man than he was. Cheers Tim * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Dear Fatherhood Foundation Having read your article, the essential message it sends to me is, "DONT GET MARRIED". The legal nightmare and financial penalty imposed on marriage by our society teaches us that any young man these days is "loopy" if he gets married. I would expect that the vast majority of people get married without the full knowledge of what marriage means over the long-term. Add to that the abyss that men will be cast into if their marriage falls apart, suggests that marriage is a no-brainer. About 50% of marriages end in divorce. A further percentage of couples live in loveless marriages for the reason that they need to keep together for the children and secondly that men can't bear to go through the battle and inevitable legal and financial defeat, which means that the majority of marriages are not sound. Add to that the fact that if a women decides to "pull the pin" for whatever reasons, the man has lost anyway. Your article suggests to me that it is best to stay faithful to your wife because of the penalty, fear, desperation and the financial penalties that will probably ruin your life, in fact, in most cases, a living hell, not because of equal love, respect and consideration. I have seen the wreckage of many men in my life whose wives decided to pull out. What the research states in your article is true. In all cases, men with failed marriages are not as happy as they were before and that is because of what has been taken away from them, their ability to start again. Until men have equality under the law in marriage, it is a failed institution. Until men become emancipated and have equality ...marriage is gambling, therefore a man has a less than 50% chance of avoiding financial ruin. There is no guidebook for men before they consider marriage. In the vast majority of cases, women only want a sperm donor to validate their reproductive needs as dictated by Feminism and trashy women's magazines and a poor sucker to pay for it, not love. Unfortunately, the romance of marriage and more importantly, the ritual and celebration of the act ie) receptions and ceremony, is promoted and has taken centre stage over the act of love, mutual respect and mutual obligation between a man and a woman. I know that the Church promotes marriage and it is well understood why, as the best way to raise children; however, the Church has to look deeper and pull its head out of the sand. What marriage was 50 years ago is not the reality today. I can understand the anxiety the Church faces in wanting to preserve the institution and its credibility; however you have to realise that without equality under the law for men, and an ability for both sides to start again if they so choose, you are promoting an institution that is causing great harm to men. A detailed workshop or course regarding marriage and it meaning, outlining the reality of a marriage for young men and women would be invaluable in preparing people for the reality of marriage. Some men may run a million miles once they know what the future could possibly hold. But this would be invaluable because it would have avoided a disaster. The 50% divorce rate would then drop as the percentage of strong marriages increases. A course of this nature, devoid of religious dogma and focusing on the practicalities of relationships, joys, responsibilities and obligations, with a focus on the secular community would be of enormous benefit to the community as it would inform people in regard to the realities of the arrangement. It would also save millions of people (families, children and extended families) from the despair, death and unhappiness that could have been avoided. I have children and am married and am celebrating 20 years of marriage this year. Your article implies, "Don't stay together out of love and respect, stay in their "man" because, our society will make your life a misery, with very little chance of starting again". God is putting this problem in front of us because it has to be fixed. The best message the Church can give any man who is considering marriage is "Are you a gambling man?" If a guy then wants to get married after considering all the ramifications of signing the marriage certificate, then it becomes much less of a gamble. Unless our society or the Church does this, your are condoning a course of action that is harmful to males. With respect and admiration for the service you provide to our community, Alexander McArthur back to top Dad's Prayer Dear God 'Some people I know think that I am crazy' 'But I don't care too much for money For money can't buy me love'. Really what I'm trying to say is . . . 'I wanna know what love is, I want you to show me' . . . And by the way . . . 'Do you believe in life after love?' Perhaps I should follow Peter Murray's advice . . . 'I get down on my knees and I pray to God' Cos when I do (and Ry Cooder's song comes to mind) 'I think things are going to work out fine'. back to top About Us Mission Statement & Help Us! Mission Statement The Fatherhood Foundation is a charitable, non profit incorporated association with a goal to inspire men to a greater level of excellence as fathers, by encouraging and educating them, thereby renewing and empowering families. Click here for more information about us Help Us! The Fatherhood Foundation believes that the key to life is giving. That's why this newsletter is given freely without expectation. Life is also about relationships. That's what being a good father is all about, developing relationships with your loved ones. If you would like to give financially to the Fatherhood Foundation, please mail your cheque or money order to: Fatherhood Foundation PO Box 440 WOLLONGONG NSW 2520 AUSTRALIA You have received the fathersonline.org newsletter because you have subscribed, or you have been subscribed by a friend. If you do not wish to receive future emails, please click the UNSUBSCRIBE button below or send an email to info@fathersonline.org with the word UNSUBSCRIBE in the subject heading. back to top Click Here to Unsubscribe ------=_NextPart_000_3E1D_01C646B5.05CBE030 Content-Type: text/html; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Fatherhood Foundation
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Issue 182 - 20th February,2006 Go to our website Here


Welcome Warwick

 

When you Google 'Can't Buy Me Love', the famous song by Paul McCartney, first performed by the Beatles, way back in the sixties, 5 million references come up.  That just shows how influential the Beatles still are today, some 45 years down the track.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'll buy you a diamond ring my friend,

If it makes you feel alright.

I'll get you anything my friend,

If it makes you feel alright,

For I don't care too much for money

For money can't buy me love.

 

It would seem that the message is still relevant today, here in Australia, as happiness and love go together.  According to a recent survey of Federal Electorates, Australia's saddest electorate is in the heart of Sydney, the richest and most expensive city in the country while the happiest voters live in one of the nation's poorest rural electorates.

 

In a survey that turns the accepted political wisdom on its head, one of the most disadvantaged electorates in Australia, the Queensland seat of Wide Bay, has emerged as the one where people are at their most content. 

 

Wide Bay, which takes in the coast of Hervey Bay and the World Heritage-listed Fraser Island, has topped Australia's 150 electorates on the basis of wellbeing and sense of community, according to the first electorate-based national index of wellbeing compiled by Deakin University.

 

In standard of living, health, achievement in life, personal relationships, sense of safety, connection to the community and future security, the index found Wide Bay came out on top - despite limping along at the bottom of other surveys that measure employment, income, education and economic strength. 

 

Eight of the top nine happiest electorates are poor and isolated rural communities, while all of the saddest seats are metropolitan or outer metropolitan seats.

 

What does this tell us?  That Paul McCartney got it right!! Money can't buy love or happiness.

 

In my career as a touring musician with a musical family, The Marshes, we have performed in some of the poorest and richest areas of the world, sometimes sleeping in African Villages on mud floors and other times in five star hotels - always connecting with the people.  Consistently we have found that the poorest of the poor are much happier than the richest of the rich.  Mother Teresa said it this way, "The curse of the third world is poverty, but the curse of the western world is loneliness and sadness."  Jesus sums it all up, "a man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions."  The joy in our life comes from the quality of our relationships, not our money in the bank.  Over the last few years there has been much talk about the work family balance, and the need to get it right.  In many ways the tension in the work family balance has got more to do with the tension about what should take priority in our lives.  Is it the 'things' that our work gives us the opportunity to acquire that are most important, or is it the love we give and receive and the quality of our relationships within our friends and family.  If you tell too many people that money can't buy love you might find yourself singing along with Billy Thorpe, 'Some people I know think that I am crazy'.  Still I think that if I was a betting man I would be putting my money on Paul McCartney's 'Can't Buy Me Love'.

 

Lovework

 

Have some fun around the dinner table with your family as you sing along with the Beatles:

 

Say you don't want no diamond ring and I'll be satisfied.

Tell me that you want those kind of things

That money just can't buy.

For I don't care too much for money,

For money can't buy me love.

Can't buy me love, everybody tells me so,

Can't buy me love, no, no, no, no.

 

You never know, if you sing it enough you just might start to believe it!

 

Yours for singing crazy songs

Warwick Marsh

 

PS  We have launched 'Operation Children First' to help the Federal Government put a priority on our children (The current Family Law Reform Amendment Proposal is fatally flawed).  Children need justice and mothers and fathers need equality in Family Law.  Shared parenting will help reduce the divorce rate and help stem the tide of fatherlessness in our nation.

 

Will you help us advocate for Australian children?  Check out the 'Operation Children First' section of the newsletter for further information.  We only have two weeks before the final vote is taken.  Help us help the children.

________________________________________


Warwick Marsh  has been married to Alison for 30 years. He is
the father of five children, four boys and one girl, ranging in
age from 25 years to 13 years.  Warwick is a musician,
songwriter, producer and public speaker who likes to think he
can still laugh at himself.

back to top

Grandads

Measure wealth not by the

things you have,

but by the things you have

for which you would not take money.

 

anon

back to top

Laughter

One afternoon a wealthy lawyer was riding in his shiny limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass.  Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate the situation.

He asked one man, "Why are you eating grass?"

"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied.  "We HAVE TO eat grass."

Shocked, the lawyer said, "Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you!"

"But sir.  I have a wife and two children with me.  They are over there, under that tree."

"Bring them along," the lawyer replied.

Turning to the other poor man he said, "You come with us, too."

The second man said, "But sir, I also have a wife and SIX children with me!"

"Bring them all!" the lawyer answered.  They all jammed into the huge limo.

Once underway, one of the poor fellows turned to the lawyer and said, "Sir, you are too kind.  Thank you for taking all of us with you."

Genuinely touched, the lawyer replied, "Glad to do it.  You'll really love my place; the grass is almost a foot high!"

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Single Dads

Press Release: March 8th, 2006

 

Equal Parenting laws AN INEVITABILITY,

says Australian Parenting group

 

Australian equal parenting group, Fathers4Equality, has stated that equal parenting time after separation is an inevitable development, simply awaiting a government with enough resolve to put the rights of children ahead of the vested interests of single mother's groups.

 

Currently, the government is in the process of debating the recently introduced Family Law Amendment Bill, a commendable bill that is intended to usher in a new era of equal parenting arrangements. As part of this process, Fathers4Equality has recently presented its well researched submission on the benefits of equal parenting to children of separated families, entitled "Parents are Forever...even if marriages are not" to the Senate Hearing on the provisions of the Family Law Amendment.

 

"The benefits of equal parenting are well accepted and have been repeatedly demonstrated in very credible research" says Ash Patil, President of Fathers4Equality. "These benefits are accepted by the majority in Parliament, however the only significant obstacles right now to a presumption of equal parenting time are the self-serving interests of single mother's groups, who tend to have a disproportional influence on the government."

 

Despite the overwhelming benefits of equal parenting time, and the well documented child abuse risks associated with single-mother households, the government has unfortunately baulked at recommending a rebuttable presumption of equal parenting time in its Family Law Amendment Bill, and has instead opted for asking the Family Court to "consider" equal parenting time only.

 

Without a rebuttable presumption of equal parenting time, many fathers are concerned that the Howard government is making the same mistake as the Keating government in 1995, with its own family law amendments that were also intended to create equal parenting as a norm. Not only did the 1995 amendments fail absolutely, but equal parenting orders as a result fell by more than half.

 

For the current Family Law Amendment Bill to achieve the full benefits of equal parenting for as many Australian children of separated families as possible, a legal presumption of equal parenting time is required, as a starting point in child custody considerations. This presumption should be rebuttable, meaning that it will not apply where there is convincing evidence that it is harmful to the child, or where the parents mutually decide on different arrangements.

 

[Distribute freely]

 

Direct link: http://www.fathers4equality-australia.org/equalparenting/fathers4equality.nsf/pages/EqualParentingInevitability

 

 

Ash Patil

president@fathers4equality-australia.org

PO Box 57, THIRROUL, NSW, 2515

0437-967-955

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All you need is Love

 

Only a wife would say that!

by Michael Kiely

 

The words popped out of my mouth before I could stop them: "Only a wife would say that!" They came so naturally and yet their effect was explosive. Let me explain: Occasionally, in the heat of conversation, you'll be explaining something and you'll quote a figure or state a fact that is not in itself important, but you miss the mark recollecting the exact figure or fact and you blurt out something to support your point, then move on. No one but a pedant would stop your flow and humiliate you in front of a group of people, but this voice pipes up: "No, that's not right. it's nearer to (whatever)..." And it is th melifluous tones of your beloved's voice. A sane man simply looks at his watch, shouts "IS that the time?" and rushes out of the room. An insane man says: "Only a wife would say that!" I am insane. I had to apologise like a b*st**d, thinking all the time "It's you who shou ld be apologising." She was deeply hurt by the remark, perhaps because it hit home. Your best friend wouldn't do it, so why will a wife do it? Exercise compassion, Michael. Likely explanation: she realised what she had done and attacked me for saying something that humiliated her in public (the mirror image of what she had done to me). Often when we have a go at someone for doing something, if we look back at ourselves we find that we have done the same thing and we're covering for ourselves. (The Bible says don't worry about the speck in your brother's eye, worry about the log in you own eye.) The fact is I humilated her in retaliation, without meaning to. It comes so easily to me to hurt her feelings, as it does to all of us. ("You always hurt the one you love..." goes the old song.) Why are we so cavalier with the feelings of those closest to us? Why can't we say all the praiseworthy things they do all the time?

 

Anyway, as luck would have it, a couple of days later she was in a position to say, "Only a husband would say that..." and we had a laugh. She's a wonderful woman because she's human and subject to human frailty. By sheer luck, so am I! We will stagger on together, wearing off the rough edges of each other to make the perfect partner, like it says in the book.

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Free Offer of E-Book for Fathersonline Subscribers

 

'Man Overboard' by Michael Kiely is a breakthrough book, designed to help men rescue and renew their marriage relationships.  Michael has been married for over 30 years, has three children and a background in business and marketing.  He shares with his readers how he rescued his own marriage when it went into crisis mode.  'Man Overboard' is short (100 pages), filled with headlines, valuable insights and quotations and doesn't beat around the bush.  Warwick Marsh, founder of the 'Fatherhood Foundation' says, 'Every man should read this book if he is serious about staying married.  It is easy to fall in love, but you have to fight to stay in love.  Michael Kiely's book will give you keys to win the battle of love and save your marriage from destruction.  'Man Overboard' will help to keep the 'love fires' burning, but beware, this book is only for the brave.  The fainthearted should not read this book.!

 

Michael is insistent that we continue to make his book available to our readers. To get your free copy of 'Man Overboard' (normally over $20), simply send your request with a copy of the first page of your fathersonline (which contains your first name and email address), to Michael Kiely: michael@newhorizon.au.com   with 'Free copy of Man Overboard' written in the subject line. Make sure you give Michael some feedback on his kindness in giving you a copy, free of charge.

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Thought of the Week


 

I'll give you all I've got to give,

If you'll say you love me too.

I may not have a lot to give,

But what I've got I'll give to you.

For I don't care too much for money,

For money can't buy me love.

 

Paul McCartney

 

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Putting Our Children First

Putting Our Children First

 

'Operation Children First' is the name given to our call for action from the fatherhood and men's groups of Australia. We must put our children first and unite with one voice and demand justice for our children and equality for mothers and fathers in the proposed family law reform.

 

We agree with Barry Williams, President of Lone Fathers Association Australia (LFAA), who gave testimony before the Senate enquiry on Friday 3rd March 2006 in Parliament House, Canberra, when he said that the "Family Law Amendment (Shared Parenting Responsibility) Bill 2005 should be renamed the Equal Parenting Time Bill 2006.  It is of the utmost importance that in this bill the words must be entrenched that the children in separated and divorced families have a natural and paramount right to have equal parenting time with their children.  For too long now, we have witnessed children not being allowed these natural rights which is an infringement on their rights as referred t o by the Charter of the Rights of the Child (United Nations).  The family relationship centres, when set up, must be told they have to start at an equal parenting time where one parent requests it."

 

We, as representatives of the fatherhood and men's movement of Australia, believe that the only way to entrench in law the above statement is through a rebuttable presumption of equal parenting time that guarantees the children this fundamental human right.  Adults divorce each other, but children do not divorce their mother and father.  Children need a mother and a father, but the current family law reform bill as now presented to the Senate, while well intentioned is fatally flawed as an instrument of reform that can guarantee our children justice, and mother and fathers equality before a court of law.  Unless such amendments, as suggested above, among others, are included in the new bill then the new family law reform bill will be ignored by the Family Law Court just as the well intentioned family law reforms suggested by the Keating Government were ignored in 1995. As Bob Dylan sings, 'When will we ever learn?'

 

The fatherhood and men's movement of Australia calls upon men as fathers to make a stand for Australia's children by doing the following.

 

1.       Contacting the Senators in your state of residence by email, letter, phone and fax.  The very best way is to go and visit them personally.  Ask them to amend the bill and put our children first. For Senate contact details go to: www.aph.gov.au  

2.       Contacting all 72 Senators by email, letter, phone, fax and appointment and ask them to put our children first and grant equality to mothers and fathers in a court of law.

3.       Contact all the media outlets you know, local papers, national papers, TV and radio, including talkback radio, and ask them to publicise the fact that the current family law reform is fatally flawed as it stands and the Family Relationship Centres will not work unless the Family Law Court is directed to give equality and justice to both parents and children.

4.       Contact all your friends, neighbours and those within your respective networks to also help you do all of the above to put our children first, above the interests of the corrupted family law system.  Our children need justice and mothers and fathers need equality.  How much longer must our children wait?

 

For comment on the above please contact:

Warwick Marsh

Fatherhood Foundation  02 4272 6677  041 822 5212

 

Barry Williams

Lone Fathers Association   02 6258 4216   0417 668 802

 

Ash Patil

Fathers for Equality  0437 967 955

 

Mark Bourne

Richard Hillman Foundation  08 8391 1755  0408 917 125

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News & Info

Nappy times ahead as baby boom hits Parramatta

Date: March 5 2006

 

By Amy Lawson

The Parramatta Eels have embarked on a secret off-season recruiting mission, but salary cap auditor Ian Schubert can rest easy - these recruits won't be ripe until at least 2023.

Six Eels players become fathers in the off-season - four for the first time.

Veteran prop Paul Stringer was the first to welcome an off-season arrival with the birth of his daughter Lucy on October 27.

It's the second child for Stringer and his wife Mel, who have a four-year-old son Jack.

Captain Nathan Cayless and fiancee Erin Pope were close behind with daughter Mia born on October 31 and Adam and Donna Peek had their first daughter Chali on November 18.

Nathan Hindmarsh's partner Bonnie Scott gave birth to their first son Archie on January 11, Glenn and Robyn Morrison had their second child, Beau Shae, on January 24, and Henry Perenara and partner Karinda Leary's son Tremayne was born on January 29.

Morrison said talk at training these days was more likely to centre on nappy-changing techniques and bottle feeding than set plays and team tactics.

"You'd never think it but the boys are sitting around at training talking about babies," he said. "You wouldn't do that in the past.

"The young blokes hear us talking about babies and they just shake their heads and walk the other way."

Despite the cringe factor for some of his younger teammates, Morrison believes the family atmosphere has been a good influence on the rookies.

"I've been in teams before where they're more party-oriented off the field," he said.

"It's a pretty mature team. Blokes will have a drink and a dance but they don't go silly.

"The young guys are keen to go out and have a good time when they can but they don't go overboard because they see how the senior players behave."

 

 

Learn the Skills to Parenting God's Way

 

The phenomenal success of the Super Nanny TV show has highlighted the great need for parents to understand how to raise children. Some of Australia's key parenting speakers will be doing just that at the 2006 Practical Parenting Seminar.

 

Produced by Media Inc, publishers of Alive and Christian Woman magazines, the Practical Parenting Seminar will show you God's way to parenting.

 

Baby Love author Robin Barker, parenting speaker and author Terri Hardwick and Focus on the Family Chairman Neville Cox will be the key speakers at this seminar, to be held at the Marriott International, North Ryde, on Saturday April 29.

 

The Practical Parenting Seminar is specifically for parents of children of all ages and teaches the art of parenting. With programs that range from taming toddlers, right through to parents learning to work together, the Practical Parenting Seminar is a must for all parents.

 

Online registration, speaker bios and a full program for the day is available at www.christianwoman.com.au  Registration is available on the morning from 8.30am, with the seminar commencing at 9.00am and finishing at 3.00pm.

 

The Practical Parenting Seminar is just $55 or $99 per couple. As a special offer, register before March 31, 2006 and you can bring along a friend for only $29.95.

 

For more information on this media release, please phone:

Glenn Wysman

Event Manager, Media Inc

Telephone: 02 8437 3541

Email: gwysman@mediaincorporated.org  

Website:  www.christianwoman.com.au  

 ________________________________________________________

Fresh Start Monthly Meeting

 

Fresh Start is a support group for people who are single again.

 

7.30pm, Saturday 25th March 2006 at St Paul's Anglican Church, 421 Old Northern Rd Castle Hill

 

Speakers: Michael & Julie Horgan are the new leaders of Fresh Start. They have a story to tell of marriage breakdown, remarriage and the challenges of raising a blended family.

 

Suggested donation:   $5.00

 

Enquiries: 96296680 - Michael or Julie

_____________________________________________

Letters

 

Dear Fatherhood Foundation

 

Thanks for the support that you are providing for fathers through your newsletter. Sometimes the simple things can be extremely helpful 'like the segment in Newsletter 182 re men hold keys to their wives' calm. There being a bit of tension in our relationship at the time, I decided to put the advice into practice immediately. I found my wife, sat next to her, and took her hand in mine. She cried. The tension was gone.

 

Thanks for that piece of positive advice.

 

Cheers

Denis

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Dear Fatherhood Foundation

 

Your newsletter is sensational - congratulations!  I have been trying to find a telephone number for you without success.

 

Kind regards

Catherine

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Thank you Fatherhood Foundation.

 

Hey, I loved the prayer at the end of the newsletter, what a challenge. I think how true it is that marriage can kill the selfishness out of men. In fact, I believe a good marriage will make a husband a better man than he was.

 

Cheers

 Tim

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

Dear Fatherhood Foundation

 

Having read your article, the essential message it sends to me is, "DONT GET MARRIED".

 

The legal nightmare and financial penalty imposed on marriage by our society teaches us that any young man these days is "loopy" if he gets married.

 

I would expect that the vast majority of people get married without the full knowledge of what marriage means over the long-term. Add to that the abyss that men will be cast into if their marriage falls apart, suggests that marriage is a no-brainer. About 50% of marriages end in divorce. A further percentage of couples live in loveless marriages for the reason that they need to keep together for the children and secondly that men can't bear to go through the battle and inevitable legal and financial defeat, which means that the majority of marriages are not sound. Add to that the fact that if a women decides to "pull the pin" for whatever reasons, the man has lost anyway.

 

Your article suggests to me that it is best to stay faithful to your wife because of the penalty, fear, desperation and the financial penalties that will probably ruin your life, in fact, in most cases, a living hell, not because of equal love, respect and consideration.

 

I have seen the wreckage of many men in my life whose wives decided to pull out. What the research states in your article is true. In all cases, men with failed marriages are not as happy as they were before and that is because of what has been taken away from them, their ability to start again.

 

Until men have equality under the law in marriage, it is a failed institution. Until men become emancipated and have equality ...marriage is gambling, therefore a man has a less than 50% chance of avoiding financial ruin.

 

There is no guidebook for men before they consider marriage.

 

In the vast majority of cases, women only want a sperm donor to validate their reproductive needs as dictated by Feminism and trashy women's magazines and a poor sucker to pay for it, not love.

 

Unfortunately, the romance of marriage and more importantly, the ritual and celebration of the act ie) receptions and ceremony, is promoted and has taken centre stage over the act of love, mutual respect and mutual obligation between a man and a woman. I know that the Church promotes marriage and it is well understood why, as the best way to raise children; however, the Church has to look deeper and pull its head out of the sand. What marriage was 50 years ago is not the reality today. I can understand the anxiety the Church faces in wanting to preserve the institution and its credibility; however you have to realise that without equality under the law for men, and an ability for both sides to start again if they so choose, you are promoting an institution that is causing great harm to men.

 

A detailed workshop or course regarding marriage and it meaning, outlining the reality of a marriage for young men and women would be invaluable in preparing people for the reality of marriage. Some men may run a million miles once they know what the future could possibly hold. But this would be invaluable because it would have avoided a disaster. The 50% divorce rate would then drop as the percentage of strong marriages increases. A course of this nature, devoid of religious dogma and focusing on the practicalities of relationships, joys, responsibilities and obligations, with a focus on the secular community would be of enormous benefit to the community as it would inform people in regard to the realities of the arrangement. It would also save millions of people (families, children and extended families)  from the despair, death and u nhappiness that could have been avoided.

  

I have children and am married and am celebrating 20 years of marriage this year.

 

Your article implies, "Don't stay together out of love and respect, stay in their "man" because, our society will make your life a misery, with  very little chance of starting again".

 

God is putting this problem in front of us because it has to be fixed.

 

The best message the Church can give any man who is considering marriage is "Are you a gambling man?"  If a guy then wants to get married after considering all the ramifications of signing the marriage certificate, then it becomes much less of a gamble. Unless our society or the Church does this, your are condoning a course of action that is harmful to males.

 

With respect and admiration for the service you provide to our community,

 

Alexander McArthur 

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Dad's Prayer

 

Dear God

 

'Some people I know think that I am crazy'

'But I don't care too much for money

For money can't buy me love'.

Really what I'm trying to say is . . .

'I wanna know what love is,

I want you to show me' . . .

And by the way . . .

'Do you believe in life after love?'

Perhaps I should follow Peter Murray's advice . . .

'I get down on my knees and I pray to God'

Cos when I do (and Ry Cooder's song comes to mind)

'I think things are going to work out fine'.

 

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About Us

Mission Statement & Help Us!

Mission Statement

The Fatherhood Foundation is a charitable, non profit incorporated association with a goal to inspire men to a greater level of excellence as fathers, by encouraging and educating them, thereby renewing and empowering families.

Click here for more information about us

Help Us!

The Fatherhood Foundation believes that the key to life is giving.  That's why this newsletter is given freely without expectation.  Life is also about relationships.  That's what being a good father is all about, developing relationships with your loved ones.
 
If you would like to give financially to the Fatherhood Foundation,
please mail your cheque or money order to:
Fatherhood Foundation
PO Box 440
WOLLONGONG  NSW  2520
AUSTRALIA

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